I Like My Flag. Please Stop Stealing It.

Flagpole holder
I woke this morning to find that again my OU flag has been stolen from the front of my house. This is the second time I have purchased a crimson & cream flag to promote the support of OU football, basketball, and to a much lesser extent, academics--only to have it pilfered in the night by someone who probably doesn't share my sentiment.

The flag itself is missing, but I was left behind a broken flagpole and a broken flagpole holder. A quick look would have revealed that the flag was attached to the pole with only a binder clip and that destroying the pole and holder was totally unnecessary if the flag itself was all they wanted.

Flagpole
I looked all around the flag holder for a note saying something like "I know my sports team isn't as good as yours, so I'm cowardly stealing your flag." I found no such note, probably because our thief was too busy breaking the flagpole to practice his penmanship skills. Therefore I will go ahead and assume he was thinking exactly this, along with various thoughts of self-hate and latent desires to buy those pills he saw advertised on the Internet.

I will wait until football season to get another flag. But the next one is going to be soaked in a bath of urushiol oil for the lasting enjoyment of its next handler.